dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I wish i was in the wii world.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
