ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
