i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
