What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
