is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
