Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Randomize
