nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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