her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
