speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
True strength comes from lack of pants
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
