All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
