This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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