Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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