I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
God, I missed his penis.
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