i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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