Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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