The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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