The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
