I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
