just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
