We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
