Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
