I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Randomize
