I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
