Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
