I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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