Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
