You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
We need to rekindle our bromance
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I touched a dick in church today
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
