Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
When are your genitals available?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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