I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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