I want to stick my p in your. b.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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