just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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