She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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