can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
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