their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
