Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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