We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
