Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
