dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
