All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Also, beer. Big fan.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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