At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
