I must be too annoying 4 u.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
50% drunk capacity currently
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
