As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
