you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i think i have two assholes
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
