chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
