He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
