It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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