You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
