I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
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