Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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