ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
